Two Months

Evelyn Anne,

These two months (now two and a half months) have flown by.  You continue light up our lives despite your colicky nature.  This month you are spending much more time awake and taking in all the chaos that is our house.  You smiled for the first time at 8 weeks.  Although you are a tough audience, it melts my heart when you finally crack one of those gummy smiles.  You have also found your hands recently.  Now a days they spend a lot of time in your mouth.  We keep hoping that you will find your thumb since the binky doesn't seem to do it for you.  You will appease us and take it every once in a while, but it is definitely not a favorite of yours.  

Unfortunately, you have spent much of the last 10 days sick.  Your cough is agonizing.  It zaps the energy right out of you.  The first few days you were so under the weather that feeding you was a chore.  I took you to the doctor only for them to say that you probably had a virus that had to work it self out.  Not sure what I was expecting.  Funny how, despite the fact I am a NICU nurse, it's all different when its your own little baby.  All senses seem to go out the window.  

Sleep is getting better for us.  We have a little routine down and you seem to do quite well with it.  Around 9 pm we get you bathed (on bath nights), and I nurse you.  We swaddle you up all nice and tight and down you go in the corner of your bed with Celine Dion serenading you to sleep.  You are usually pretty tired and go down without a fight.  Occasionally, daddy or I will have to go back in, coerce you to take the binky and then sneak out.  You are then out until about 4 am when I bring you to bed with us and we both fall asleep while nursing.  With this cold though, you have been so congested after eating that I have been putting you in your swing where you will stay until about 9 am usually.  Not to shabby I tell ya!

You are nursing like a champ, but taking a bottle like a loser.  It's my own fault.  It's a good thing we have 3 months left to work this out before Nana or Daddy gets stuck with a baby that won't eat.  You nurse on an inconsistent bases.  But that's ok, because it works.  It tends to be about every 3-4 hours but some days you go longer in the morning while we are running errands and then cluster feed in the evening.  Evenings are definitely the hardest for us.  You want to be held at all times.  The second you feel us put you down in the swing or the bouncer the tears roll.  How can I blame you though, you have a lot of competition.  You have to get the attention any way you can.

Mommy has finally put away most of your newborn clothes.  There are only a few pieces left that you still fit into.  We also used your last newborn diaper today.   While you still fit in them the blowouts are becoming more frequent so momma bit the bullet and did it.  It kills me!  You are growing up entirely too fast.  You weighed in at 9 pounds even when we visited the doctor.  That puts you almost to double your birth weight.  Did you not get the memo that you are not supposed to do that until 6 months?  I guess all those rules go out the window when you are a premie born 5 weeks early at 5 pounds 5 ounces.  

You are a true blessing Miss Evelyn Anne.  There is not a day that goes by that I don't stare at you and wonder how in the world I go so lucky.  It is a true sign that God is at work in our lives.  

We love you little one.

Graham {two}

Graham Cracker,

Today is your day!  Today you are two!

Once again I am not quite sure how we got here, but we did.  And I am loving it.  You are the funniest little guy who wants nothing more than to be a big boy.  Your vocabulary is exploding.  You repeat everything we say all day long.  I can just see those little wheels turning in there.  Your favorite thing is to say "yook momma..." and then show me whatever goofy action strikes you at the moment.  Usually it is some odd side step that you apparently think is hilarious.  I guess I do too since I laugh hysterically at you.  In the car you frequently yell "Momma, yindow up!" even when the window's are in fact already up.  

You and Alex are at it every moment of the day.  It's exhausting.  Alex will purposefully get you going by proclaiming that whatever object may be near him is his, whether it is or not.  You quickly reply with "No, MINE!" and he shoots it right back.  You guys could go on with this for a good 30 minutes if I let you.  There are those brief moments that you two actually play together and it is heaven.  

You are no Alex when it comes to sleep.  In fact there have been days where you refuse to nap at all.  Let me tell you, it makes for a long day for this momma.  On a normal day though, you will nap for about 2 hours.  You wake between 7-8 in the morning and go to bed around 8:30.  We have finally broken you of the night time bottle but you still insist on them occasionally in the morning.  The binky is a whole other story.  We were well on our way to allowing them only in bed... and then Evie was born.  Now the thing is in your mouth all day long.  We are working on this at the moment. 

Speaking of teeth, you had your first dental visit at the Seattle Children's Center for Pediatric Dentistry. You weren't at all cooperative but we made it through and learned that you are indeed getting the tooth that we assumed you were missing near your cleft.  

Graham, you are growing up so fast.  You continue to amaze me each and every day with your antics.  You are the most lovable little boy who will hand out hugs to anyone that asks.  You are very friendly and spend our shopping trips waving and saying hi to every passer-by.  Two years ago we were completely unsure of what to expect with you.  You taught us so much in those early months and continue to do so today.  We love you for you, and all you are... Even when you are Trouble.



Yep, you are indeed two.  As demonstrated by this photo shoot.

I'll take it. 

Mommas

Being a momma is one of the most amazing, challenging, heart wrenching, rewarding things you can do!  Yes, it's tough, and some of the time not very rewarding.  It's giving all of yourself without always getting anything in return.  It's loving unconditionally when some times it's heard to do.  It's being patient, even when you have asked them to do something for the hundredth time.  It's kissing boo-boos and giving hugs.  It's lifting them up when they are down.  It's about letting them fail so in time they can succeed, even though it kills you.  It's a lot of sleepless nights and cups of coffee to make it through the day.  

I do it today and I will do it again tomorrow, because I love these four more than I could have ever imagined I could.

I couldn't do all of this without my amazing role model.  Thank you mom for teaching me everything there is to know about being a mom.  I love you!

These moments

I love you Evelyn.

First Communion

Last sunday was a big day in our family, Tyler James made his First Communion.  I couldn't be more proud to be his Momma.

I know I say it all the time, but this is just one more instance of how fast time moves.  I vividly remember sitting in mass watching a group of little second graders make their first communion with a tiny little love bug in my arms.  I thought to myself, won't that be so cool to see this little guy up there some day, a long time from now.  Well, that day came.  My little love bug is now a big love bug and he did great.  Didn't even grimace when sipping the wine.  He came back to the pew to proclaim, "Mom, I like the wine!"

Unfortunately, he went the opposite way so I didn't get really great photos.  But, I caught some of Karsten.

I love this photo of him giving Father a high five!

His amazing Godparents, Nick and Kate.

We are so proud of you Tyler James!

{Four}

Alexander,

Four years you have been in our lives.  Four years we have been blessed with your contagious smile.  Four years we have been tested by your unwavering stubbornness.  Four years, and we have loved every minute. 

You, as I have said over and over, are my sweetest, most loving child, but also the most challenging.  I recently looked up the definition for stubborn.  

Stubborn:

"Having or showing dogged determination not to change one's attitude or position on something, esp. in spite of good arguments or reasons."  

Yep, that's you to a T.  If it is not your idea, good luck!  You are wise beyond your years... and it kills me.  In response to me saying that you may not have a granola bar before dinner recently you replied with "Uhh, mommmm.  You're ruining my life."  Really?  Sorry buddy, you got a lot of years ahead of you, I am sure it will get worse.

You are thoroughly enjoying school this year.  Your teachers are constantly commenting on your happy nature.  I especially love all of the "art" you bring home for us.  You have made a lot of new friends this year and even had your first play date at a girl's house.  You are kind of smitten for Miss Lexie I'd say.  Tyler, Landon and Evan are just a few of your friends that we meet up with regularly.  

In stark difference to how you are at school you are not always a peach at home.  Graham and you have a love/hate relationship.  When you play together happily it is heaven for mommy.  But, the reality is that most the time you don't.  There is a lot of arguing, screaming and even the occasional hitting when you guys butt heads.  It can make for some long days for mommy.  You and Tyler have plenty of  moments too.  However, with Evie you are the most nurturing, loving and caring brother.  When she is crying you do what ever it takes to help her, even letting her suck on your thumb.   There is nothing better than watching you with her.  It makes my heart melt a million times over.  

This year you started in swimming lessons at Children's but once you moved up to the intermediate class you made up your mind that you were not going to do it.  We tried for an entire session to coax you back into the pool to no avail and eventually gave up.  I am hoping to get you started up again this summer... we'll see.  I also just signed you up for your first ever soccer camp this summer.  I am so excited to see you getting started in some sports.  I am hoping that your determination takes you a long way on the field.  

Some of the things you are loving right now:
bike riding
Buzz Lightyear
going to the bank with Boppa

Alex, your bright smile lights up my morning each and every day and I am not quite sure what I would do without your constant "I love you mom".  You test me each and every day and challenge me to be the best mom I can possibly be.  Sometimes I fail and sometimes I succeed.  But no matter what you are still right next to me, loving me just as much as I love you.  

I love you Alexander... to infinity and beyond!

Being a mom of 4...

By my lack of blog posts I think it is quite apparent that being a mom of four leaves little time to do the things that I want to do.  I am not going to lie and say that it is all roses and sunshine here... ok, maybe it is sunshine because Seattle is having some absurdly nice May weather, but there are definitely no roses.  It's tough.  This stuff is not for sissies.  I am not going to short change all of the help I have had either.  I am pretty sure I would be curled up in a ball on the floor in my room if it weren't for all my family and friends.  

On any given day it is pretty much a miracle if I get showered AND put make-up on.  My days are filled with feeding, pumping, breaking up fights, cleaning, and shushing a fussy baby in a never ending circle.  Graham, even if he can't see me, has an innate sense when I am feeding Evie and chooses to use this time wisely.  He gets into any and every bad thing he can, or heads straight to his brother and just starts whaling on him.  He's a brut, this kid.  Life as I know it is definitely no longer about me, at least not for the foreseeable future.  But, it's ok.  It's what I signed up for and it's being a mom...

Something I wouldn't, in a million years, give up!

Little Miss Evelyn is giving me a run for my money.  I don't want to say she has colic, but man she is a fussy one.  I have never had a fussy baby.  My mother-in-law will be the first to say I completely lucked out with easy babies, until now.  It really isn't the crying that I mind.  Lord knows I have put up with a fair amount of crying in my day.  But, the helpless feeling that it gives you is unbearable.  I am her mom.  I am supposed to make everything better.  But I can't, it seems.  Sure I can feed her, which provides her relief for that short time, but give her a few minutes and she is back to it.  There are times when the other kids need me and I just have to put her down and let her scream.  I hate it!

Night time is really the only reprieve from the crying.  Although she wakes up frequently to eat she tends to fall right back to sleep... so long as she is snuggled into me (much to Dan's chagrin).  We have never been and never wanted to be the co-bedding family but when it means that I get some sleep to deal with the day of crying ahead of me, then so be it.  I know that this is going to pass, and when it does we can work on the sleeping arrangements.

The boys, for the most part, have been great about all the crying.  However, Alex did tell me the other day "Mommy, we need to put Evie back in your tummy 'cause she cries too much."  Tyler will try his hardest to console her when there are things that I need to do, like tending to Graham.

And Graham, well he just pokes her in the eye proclaiming "eyes, eyes".

Nonetheless, Evie is a such a joy to have in the family.  At 1 month old she is having more alert times, usually crying unfortunately.  She loves to be snuggled and hates to be put down.  She eats about every 3 hours, but falls asleep quickly during it.  She seems to like to be on the go.  Good thing, seeing how she is number 4.  Like I mentioned above, she spends most of the night in bed with us, with some time spent in the co sleeper.  She is not a huge fan of the swing because that mens she is being put down.  I am trying my hardest to enjoy every single moment with her, even the fussy ones, because I know as well as anyone how fast this time goes.